Originally Answered: How would you react if Scarlett Johansson came to your house tonight dressed as a black widow?
How would you react if Scarlett Johansson came to your house tonight dressed as a black widow?

I invite her in. I apologize for the mess. I yell to my wife, “Honey, guess who’s here? It’s Scarlett Johansson! And she’s dressed as the Black Widow!”

“Miss Johansson, my wife is going to be so excited to meet you! We’re both big fans of yours! She especially liked your performance in ‘Marriage Story’”

“I hope you’ll meet my puppies! They’re both big Scarlett Johansson fans as well. You can hold one if you like. They’re very friendly and they love to be held”

“Speaking for myself, I’m also very friendly and I love to be held! Oh, here comes my wife, never mind.”

“Can I offer you something to drink? I have all of your movies on DVD, would you like for all of us to watch one together? Oh, you’ve probably seen them already”

“Oh, goodness me, I’ve been talking non-stop and haven’t let you say a word! Forgive me! Oh, and you look stunning in that outfit! Is it uncomfortable? Do you do all of your own stunts? Is this your favourite role? It’s mine. What do you think of giving up the Black Widow to Yelana Belova, like in the comics? Do you think Natasha Romanov will make another appearance in the Marvel movies? Would you consider playing her again? Oh, here I go again. I can’t stop talking. I’m just a big fanboy, I’m afraid.”

“So, what brings you here?”

Then I realized that I’m actually stoned out of my gourd and standing in the middle of my yard talking to myself in my pajamas. Scarlett Johansson would never come visit me.