It’s early October, so you have perhaps found yourself wondering why we don’t yet know who is the Sєxiest woman of 2013. Wonder no more: Esquire magazine has named one Ms. Scarlett Johansson the Sєxiest Woman Alive this year.
Hold on a Sєxy minute though, you might say. Is it 2005 again? Good memory, Sєxiest Woman Alive connoisseur. Scarlett Jo also prevailed seven years ago—but Esquire notes that she is even Sєxier this decade. She is the first woman to claim this тιтle twice.
So, how Sєxy is Scarlett? Here is a selection of words and phrases from the article, in the order that they appear, that convey this woman’s desirability: “Oh, for a muse of fire”; “small, ringless finger”; “ᴀss”; “cheek”; “you feel that voice”; “a woman who will share her sandwich“; “Cat on a H๏τ Tin Roof“; “offering ascendant beauty in every scene”; “so mutable, more slender than buxom and fleshy”; and, finally, “flesh-tearing supernatural.”
As a further testament to her Sєxiness, author Tom Chiarella also devotes a significant portion of the article to his own fidgeting nervousness in the presence of Johansson. He expresses embarrᴀssment over saying crudités instead of vegetables. He flubs a simple saying: “A bird in hand is worth two in the bird.” He describes wondering whether to look at her ᴀss: “I didn’t look at her ᴀss. I don’t know that she wanted me to. Probably not. Surely not. In any case, I didn’t.”
Johansson herself, meanwhile, emphasizes her current exhaustion and sense of professional obligation. She’s overworked and tired and wants little more than to sleep in and read the paper, she says. Given her busy schedule, will she have time, asks Chiarella, to accept the Sєxiest Woman тιтle and all its duties? Johansson has an honest answer. Accepting a тιтle like this is a reluctant career move:
You know, I gotta hustle. I’m a twenty-eight-year-old woman in the movie business, right? Pretty soon the roles you’re offered all become mothers. Then they just sort of stop. I have to hedge against that with work — theater, producing, this thing with Esquire … Sounds pretty bloodless, I guess.
So, now you know: The Sєxiest Woman Alive in this year is unenthusiastic, a little tense about her future, and still part of the hustle.
